In my time here, I have done some work at Mariola’s office (Joni i Przyjaciele Polska/Joni and Friends Poland) and at Krzysztof’s office (Społeczność Chrześcijańska Północ/Christian Fellowship Church North). I have loved both for different reasons. The best part of working with Krzysztof is that his office is full of fun Polish people who want to be my friend! (Mariola works alone. If her office was full of people they might also want to be my friends.) So I have met some really nice people.

Two of the people I have met are Marcin (recent seminary grad and newest employee of Społeczność Chrześcijańska Północ) and his fiancee Gosia. After a few weeks of getting to know them in the office, Marcin approached me and asked if I had time to come to their wedding!!! I was so shocked! In Poland, pretty much anyone can come to the wedding, but the party afterwards is much smaller. They were asking me to both! I said YES! THANK YOU!!!

Well, the wedding has come and passed, and I wanted to reflect on some of the uniquely Polish things I noticed about it.

Ślub (aka wedding ceremony):

The bride and groom arrive to the chapel together! There is not this whole weird bride and groom being separate all day thing that I have never understood. I think it is strange that the first time most couples see one another on their wedding day, a jillion other people are there. I would at least like to say hi first.

Then there are no brides maids or groomsmen. There are “two witnesses” which are essentially the maid of honor and best man. The bride and groom each pick one person to be the official witnesses for the marriage license. And they don’t walk down the aisle, they are seated with the family (because they usually are a sister or brother). And they don’t have to buy a poofy dress! I really loved this. Low key…it was nice.

Then they walk down the aisle together. I did not love this so much. I really like the biblical symbolism of leaving your family and cleaving to your husband with the whole father/daughter walking together thing.

Then, during the preaching, etc, they sit together on a loveseat on the stage! I love this! Why all the unnecessary standing in American weddings? They looked so comfortable, and they were facing the guests, so we could all see their faces, they could all see us, we could actually see the front of her dress. I loved this!

The chapel was decorated so sweetly. I also loved this. There were a few flower arrangements on the stage, a few candles, and that’s it. It was just all so simple and sweet. It didn’t feel so much like a huge expense, but instead an important ceremony. I wasn’t distracted by all of the extra stuff, but my focus was entirely on the ceremony. Isn’t that the point of weddings anyways? Sometimes I am not so sure…

And now….wesele! aka reception!

Now, this was not your typical wesele, I am told, because most of them involve copious amounts of vodka and dancing until the next morning, followed by breakfast! This was a little more conservative, and lots of fun! We came in, and all had an assigned seat. I felt so special with my little name card. The tables were piled with yummy traditional Polish salads, juices, fruits, etc.

There was one table at the front of the room for the panna młoda (bride), pan młody (groom), and their two witnesses (her sister, his brother). They greeted us all, and blessed the food, and the feasting began! They starting bringing out pots of soup, platters of meat, baskets of bread, it just kept coming!

Then, they showed a slideshow of pictures of their lives, as usual. Then we ate some more.

Then they showed the video of their engagement, which happened in a hot air balloon! Then we ate some more.

Then they showed the video of their bachelor/bachelorette parties. He went to a shooting range, she went to a spa. Then we ate some more. How are Polish people not fat??????

Then we ate desserts. Lots of them.

THEN they brought out the wedding cake, which was more like a sheet cake than the tiers we usually see. And we ate it.

Everyone kept asking me questions about American weddings, if what they see in the movies is true, if there really is a wedding industry, etc. I told them that, yeah, pretty much that is what we have. They asked, “Even at Christian weddings?” and I had to say yes. This saddened me. How far we have come from honoring a couple’s marriage and then having a nice time of food and fellowship. It was just so relaxing and enjoyable.

It made me very proud of my own sister whose wedding was quite low-key, and also made me very sad because I missed Lauren’s wedding this summer.

And then the bride and groom walked around the room, talking with everyone, and when they came around to me THEY were thanking ME profusely for “making time for their wedding”. I was blown away. I was thanking THEM profusely for inviting me, who they just met to share in this beautiful day!

Overall, it was a lovely evening. And the couple was in church the next morning before leaving on their FOUR WEEK honeymoon. A – church is important, and they recognize that. B – she is a student, he works at a church, so they get FOUR WEEKS of honeymoon. ONE MONTH. I still can’t get over this.